"I'm blessed."

So there are those times when I feel this nagging that it's time to pray, or time to stop and listen, or time to write...and this is one of those times. I cannot believe that it has been almost 3 months since I have updated my blog. What a slacker I am! I've stopped and thought, "hmmm...maybe I should update my blog and talk about how my summer ended or how things have changed after my trip", but just never had that nagging like I do now. Can I just say that I am so amazed at how many people actually read my blog...I mean, wow. I began this blog with the intention of having another way to express myself creatively, emotionally, and spiritually, and when I returned home to those "Jenny I read your blog"'s from SO many people in my community, I was absolutely blown away. I cannot express my gratitude to those who tuned in to see what God had in store for me, the mission teams, and the Nicaraguans who were on a mission to serve Him...and my utmost gratitude goes to the Lord, the Master of it all. Oh what a mighty God we serve!
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I've had my ups and downs since leaving Nicaragua. The spiritual tension has been challenging. I feel homesick at times, and I just want to talk about what I did there, even though I've already repeated myself time and time again -- I truly feel like there will be no end to my, in all honesty, love affair with my missions experiences. I just find it so much harder here because there aren't tons of people willing to listen. It makes my day when I have someone tell me that they would love to spend the day hearing about my experiences, and I would love to spend hours upon hours giving God all the glory He deserves...but it seems like those who I want to listen don't really want to hear what I have to say. I think that has been one of the most difficult things to cope with. However, I will share one experience with y'all...I've found that prayer does work wonders. Increased prayer over someone or something has kind of guided them in the direction I believe God wants them to go. It is such a pleasant surprise when God goes ahead and paves the way for a situation so that when the time is right, we can sit down and talk about Jesus (after all the prayers).

Do not be anxious about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. Philippians 4: 4-6

One thing I have noticed is how my faith has been strengthened and how I have been humbled. This summer gave me real perspective on life. There are so many times in the past where I've been so selfish..it has brought out the worst in me. I've found that it is so easy to get caught up in my life and not look out amongst the living. Have you ever been to a soup kitchen or experienced helping out those at a homeless shelter? If you have or haven't, I challenge you to. One thing you'll find out is that the majority of those men and women have positive outlooks on life. If you ask "How are you today?" they will usually simply respond with "I'm blessed." How humbling that is...two words that put me in my place and really make me realize just how blessed I am -- to have so much and still complain about how I don't like this or I don't want that. Praise the Lord for the stress in my life, school really is not that bad. I have a roof over my head and a pantry full of food. After 22 years of living, I know that I too have been SO AMAZINGLY blessed and no matter how much I try, no amount of gratitude will be able to express my gratitude for what He has given me. It's by grace, I have been saved, and His grace is sufficient.
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One of my favorite things is sitting here thinking about how the Lord never ceases to keep me in line...that little humbling factor that teaches me I'm not in charge, He is; I'm not perfect, He is; I'm a servant, not a ruler; I'm here to make disciples and show the fruits of the spirit to everyone, not to bring my brother or sister down.

When you talk, do not say harmful things, but say what people need--words that will help others become stronger. Ephesians 4:29

I will try to update my blog more than once every 3 months...hopefully more like 1 or 2 times a week. Again, if no one reads this, I don't mind...I'm just here to express myself and discuss how the Lord has impacted my life for the better. He is awesome! Amen.